Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Welcoming. . .

You never come back, not all the way. Always there is an odd distance between you and the people you love and the people you meet, a barrier thin as the glass of a mirror, you never come all the way out of the mirror; you stand, for the rest of your life, with one foot in this world and no one in another, where everything is upside down and backward and sad.
-Marya Hornbacher

This is the truth. 

After something very strong takes a place inside of you, you're never able to return to normality as soon as possible. It seems too unreal, to return back, that you sort of deny the possibility, let it make you back up, let it make you return to your self-destruction and you're own heart breaking.

It's simple at first. All you do is follow the given directions. You go to sites, read their tips, and you go ahead and try them out. I know this of course, because you are here yourself, hoping for tips to get you going, hoping this site will be the one you get your inspiration from. You want me to tell you you can be skinny and that this is your new day.

I'm not gonna do that.

Because in reality, you cannot wake up a day after fasting and have lost thirty pounds.

And you cannot follow through with your first fast.
And you cannot ever actually have a perfect starve.

You'll make mistakes, of course. You'll  screw up, you'll lose people, you'll lose feelings. It's all part of the process.

This opening is not kind, it is not selfless and caring, because starving isn't either. So, yeah, I'm gonna make you cry a few times.

But the love for skinny is the kind of love worth fighting for.

So fight.


Right now.